The two wolves

If you haven’t seen “Our mental health crisis’ on BBC iPlayer then this is a must watch for anyone with teenagers, in healthcare or in the education space.

Alex George is an A&E doctor and the first youth mental health ambassador. His programme ‘Our mental health crisis’ on BBC iPlayer is a frank and honest report of the crisis that is going on in young people and the importance of early intervention.

This is something we are so passionate about.

Stopping things early.

Giving young people a tool box for their teenage years and dealing with any issues as they emerge not once they have taken hold.

Lack of resources, a stretched education sector , an overwhelmed healthcare system and difficult access are meaning that is often only in a crisis or when a problem is so deep seated that young people are accessing help. 

This is really important stuff.

During the programme you get to meet his incredible family who live just down the road from us in...

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Fear and adventure

Fear and adventure

Two powerful and inextricably linked things.

Last week we welcomed one of our brilliant original HOW speakers Mikaela Toczek back to our membership to chat about adventures and microadventures.

Those smaller adventures right from your doorstep and reasons why these are so good for your soul. Alistair Humpheries talks about flipping the 9-5pm and getting out after work for an over night microadventure to be back at your desk at 9am the next day! 

Click here to find out more and watch his short film on Microadventures.

Elizabeth Gilbert, from her book Big Magic writes about how she addresses her fear when unknown outcomes are in the horizon:

Dearest Fear.

Creativity and I are about to go on a road trip together. I understand you’ll be joining us, because you alway do.

There’s plenty of room in this vehicle for all of us, so make yourself at home, but understand this: Creativity and I are the only ones who will be making any decisions...

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Showing up

consistency showing up Oct 19, 2021

Consistency is something I have only grasped in middle age. 

It is a powerful thing so thought we should share

Starting something new, whether it is a business, a different hobby or a new subject at school, is hard work, complicated, not very slick and often a bit scary.
 
It is scrappy. In the words of The DO Lectures. (if you don't follow them then do and look out for any of their podcasts or books they are brilliant)

But, nothing happens without hard work, consistency and showing up.

You need to show up to the piano keyboard and practice to improve.

You need to show up at your desk to get your head around a new topic or project.

You need to show up on the pitch to get better at football.

You need to show up in your business to get things off the ground.

It has been a busy few months for us opening the membership again and launching into classrooms and it has felt a bit messy, complicated and...
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Is it time to travel again?

Having both been lucky enough to travel a lot over the years we have friends and family across the world.

Prior to March 2020, it had felt that the world was a pretty small place and that any one of these people were just a quick flight away with the big barriers being cost, environmental impact plus the practicalities of travelling with young children.

Then came along a pandemic to shake that all up.

Not being able to visit family, see friends, explore different places, plan trips, deepen those connections with others that live away from our local area made us realise how important that was to us and grew our appreciation of the travel industry and our love of adventures.

Yes, this has lead to more micro adventures at home and making sure we know and love the wonders that are on our doorsteps but, as we creep out of this last 2 years of social isolation, we are looking forward to spreading our wings again, recharging and reconnecting with those who live around the world and...

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The Edge

*THE EDGE* (Trigger warning)

Written by psychotherapist Joanna Williams 

Ever write a post and think maybe it's a bit heavy? If it helps just one person. It's worth it!

Here goes..

Have you ever found yourself drawn to the edge.

A strange mix of "If I.. could I.. will I"

That obscure feeling of appeal and allure that can start to feel inviting..

No, I don't mean with harness and rope or rigged to a wing.. I mean standing there. Facing your own mortal mind that wants you to step off...

If you haven't I hope you don't!

And if you have?

I want you to know that it's not as uncommon or strange as it might seem. You haven't gone crazy or mad! Life can feel exhausting. The battles we fight in our mind can feel Intoxicating; overwhelming, convincing...

Suicidal thoughts are common.

But there is an alternative exit strategy..

One which I hope helps just one person to get back on the path to life!

Those feelings and urges, as convincing as they might be, are transient, changeable and...

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Back to school worry for parents

Are you worried about your kids?

Join the club.
Grab some paper and a pen and jot down 3 vertical columns.

Column one

Write down what's worrying you.
Specifics please, no waffle…

Column two

For now leave blank.

Column three

Write down what it is you want to be better.

So, what does it look like when it’s fixed? Or, if you achieved everything in this column as you’ve written it, would you be calm and happy again? 

Done?

Go back to your 2nd column.

This is your to do list.

What is in your control to do something about it to solve it?

What can you do today, now, that gets you there?

Written by our great friend and business mentor and mum of three teenagers, Amanda Morgan Thomas. Amanda offers coaching and consultancy to individuals and businesses and is a breath of fresh air. Thank you Amanda. Click here for full details

The HOW People
www.thehowpeople.com

The HOW People inspire the next generation of awesome humans in a digital world. Workshops, courses,...

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4 things I wish I knew: Parenting teens

One

• Generally, I’ve found that if us parents are over-involved, we provide fewer opportunities for our kids to self-reflect. We must allow our kids to feel and to be curious about how those feelings affect our behaviours. Every time they experience something new, they are adding to their self-confidence balance sheets

Two 

• Be prepared to share your fails with them and show them how you got back up. It may be messy, but if you can bounce then they can too. It’s not the falling that we learn from it’s how we style it out.

Three

• Let them figure out problems and concerns by themselves...and then celebrate with them.

Four

• If you are anxious, your kids will feel it. Tell them. Share your emotions with them and also explain what you’re doing about it. This will create a two-way exchange that will serve you well through the teenage years. Trust.

Amanda Morgan Thomas is mum of three teens, business mentor, coach and advisor to...

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Self confidence vs Confidence

What is the difference between self confidence and confidence?

There are lots of answers to this but we like this one.

Self-confidence is being secure in yourself and your abilities. 

Confidence draws on evidence of things you've been able to do or achieve in the past.

If we just rely on confidence, what do we do if we don’t have the evidence or haven’t done something before?

Ah, yes.. we have to rely on having SELF confidence.

We have to GROW it.

Being able to trust yourself and back yourself. To be able to believe in yourself that you can go out there and do what you say you are going to do.

This needs work. No one is born with this certainty and courage in their convictions. It takes hard work and personal growth. Working on and building our self confidence is about showing up despite being nervous. Doing things even though we might not want to. This gives us the experience which will then not only help our self confidence but give us the evidence we need for our...

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We got it wrong

You asked, we listened. 

Listening is a skill.

You asked us two questions.

1. Why our ‘Moving on up’ course is only for girls?
2. I can’t make the live sessions. Will they be recorded?

Answer 1: We were wrong. And here’s why.

‘HOW Inspire’ is our signature digital membership for teen girls only. We hold a safe space for young women to come and be themselves at an age when everything is changing. They can talk openly about their changing bodies, hormones, friendship, anxieties, navigating social media and relationships whilst meeting amazing role models and forming an awesome community along the way. Sometimes, this is best done with just us girls to discuss. It’s a weekly call with videos on: an open community of awesome teens. Inspiring, exciting, safe.

‘Moving on up’ is NEW!

Maybe we got a bit stuck in our ways.
Maybe a bit stuck in our comfort zone.

‘Moving on up’ is recorded and with no cameras on for attendees...

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One Extraordinary Dog


This is a bit of a personal one.

Those of you who know us as a family will already be aware of this but, for those that don’t, I thought that maybe sharing my feelings can help others with theirs.

This is for any children, teens, young adults, older adults who have lost a pet.

I have never had a dog before.

When I was growing up over time we had a guinea pig, a couple of rabbits, a hamster and later on a cat.

But, never a dog.

My husband wanted two. Mulder and Scully #TheXFiles

So, after we had Polly who is now 14, Scully was the next to enter the family and last week we said a very sad goodbye.

Scully was a bit of an extraordinary dog. Everyone who met him loved him.

You’d be looking around wondering where he was on the beach and calling his name to always find him by your feet.

He never went far.

You’d leave food on the side or wander around a market full of delicious smells and he’d have a sniff and walk on by.

He’d take himself off into the woods to...

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